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Life is Tetris

 With each day that passes, I come to terms with the fact the life is a game of Tetris and my disability does not fit. 

Fourteen years ago I began a concerted campaign to build my inner self so no matter how disabled my outside body may be I will never be broken.

Using lessons learnt from the Catholic Bible, Eckhart Tolle, Deepak Chopra, Jack Kornfield, and the 14th Dalai Lama I laid the foundation for a calm yet strong approach to life. 

I have now added to this bedrock the wisdom and lessons I have gained from the writings of Ryan Holiday. In particular from his books: The Obstacle is the Way, Ego is the Enemy, Lives of the Stoics, Stillness is the Key, and the brand new masterpiece Courage is Calling. 

Most importantly from all my research I now know how to live my life in an optimal way. 

It is important to breathe, to detach from outcomes, take a universal perspective, and do not judge yourself or others. 

I also believe it is more important than ever to deal with what is in front of you; just do the work. 

My new system has been stress tested quite a lot thanks to the COVID-19 pandemic and recent interactions with medical professionals. 

For example when I was being transported via ambulance to a hospital in my local area, the ambulance was told the hospital could not accept me because "they're not sure if they have a doctor who would be willing to take responsibility for such a severe case of cerebral palsy!". At which point the ambulance was forced to turn around to take me to the already full public hospital. 

I have experienced discrimination in subtle ways before but this was the first time within my memory specifically because of my cerebral palsy. 

As things about my cerebral palsy become increasingly difficult and my support systems change, I have to admit for the first time my disability is getting old. 

It is true that life is Tetris and with my philosophical and spiritual armour in place I know even if I don't fit I can always write a poem. 



Life is Tetris


In the Tetris of life I don’t fit.
My wheelchair is an inconvenient shape; 
Disability is a truth the world wants to escape.
You ask me to quit. 
No matter which way they turn me.
I don’t fit.


My physical disability forces me to watch the waiting time.
I ask for help and wait without reason or rhyme
Clock ticks away the hour.
I’m physically retarded but filled with inner power.


As a boy I cried each time my disability was denied.
When I called, why did the doctor hide?
I no longer dress to impress.
I calmly stay in the waiting time; 
I don’t fit in this game of Tetris. 


Chris Van Ingen | 15 October 2021



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